Reading letters on this site prompted me to write own letter of recovery. I hope it helps you!
In 2006, aged 62, redundant, newly retired, I thought I was OK. I played some music for a friend's funeral, and suddenly, January 1st, 2007, my life had nowhere to go, all I could see was the end of the pier, with no other options left. The combination of these two, and maybe, other events, brought me lower than ever before. Tears, no reason to get out of bed, nothing. My wife suggested I go to the doctor, and eventually I did, with her. My doctor was brilliant........after a long chat, longer than you're normally given, he said this, "I think you're like a marathon runner, your legs have gone. You will run again, but not today."
Time passed, friends were great with coffee and cake, "come round when you want.......no pressure", they said, and they were true to their word! That was so helpful.
A farmer friend had me out with his sheep, doing all sorts of things, he was like a shepherd to me! Totally unconnected to my doctor, a friend gave me a newspaper picture of Paula Radcliffe......remember how she failed in Athens? But here she was, having won the New York Marathon, "RUNNING AGAIN".
So don't give up, my friend........it will take time.....I needed medication for a couple of years to restore the balance, I even preached on depression at church, and was amazed how many people said, "That was me too, but I've never been able to share it!"
You will find as you move through this time, there are others who feel just like you.
Take heart, you are not alone, you will "run again".