As a doctor who withstood the agony of depression andcame out of it fit and fine and cheerful, I write wishing that I might be able to give insight on how to tackle this condition with hope and courage.
I know that with depression we suffer mostly in isolation because while it is easy to relate to physical illness, empathy for someone with depression is difficult except for those who have gone through the agony themselves or who as psychiatrists have been trained to understand what the patient is going through without having been there themselves. Don't blame your dear ones, they really cannot understand your pain or your agony.
I also know that the depressive thought process is not in your control. For some cheerful moments you know them to be irrational and feel normal but then, like a worm they come back. I know, early mornings are the worst - when everyone else is sleeping comfortably, you are wide awake and feeling helpless, hopeless, the world seems dark and the pain and agony almost unbearable. At times you feel almost
fine, but then the feeling of negativity comes back like a dark cloud, enveloping your mind and you have no control.
I also know that you feel you will never, ever feel normal, happy, confident again. That the worm that keeps coming back will never go away, or that if it does go away
it will come back - may be soon, may be after some months or even after years.
But please, take it for me that your condition is eminently treatable and curable. That you will again be happy and cheerful and enjoy life in all its bright colours. That soon the world will no longer be grey, the worm will go away never to come back. Just have faith in your doctor (psychiatrist), take the medicines if that is what's been suggested and what you want to do and don't be afraid to talk about your agony with your
friends and family members. And give the medicines time to take effect - don't expect results in just a few days, but be sure that things will be fine one day soon when all
this will look like a bad, bad dream.
I know it is hard for you to believe me when i say this, but it is now 30 years since I had depression which had lasted a long time. As expected I have faced great turmoil in my life in these years along with great happiness. I am proud to say I faced all that with courage and without recurrence of my depression. One day you will also be able to say the same - proudly!
Take care, have faith and belief.